Something Buried
by scriptophile
Summary: A grave emotion called love. — Nnoitra/Nelliel


**Title:** Something Buried

**Synopsis:** A grave emotion called _love_. — Nnoitra/Nelliel

**Genre:** Fanfiction/Drama/Romance

**Status: **Completed

_**Note**__: I thought and thought for two straight days and I still couldn't come up with a good synopsis, so..._

_**Note 2**__: NnoiNell is probably the only fanfiction oneshot I'll ever write on here 'cause I ship them so hard. So, so hard._

_**Note 3**__: Trust me, my NnoiNell works are pretty good, haha! Give me a chance ^.^_

—

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_**DING-DONG!**_

Nnoitra stood at the end of the hallway and stared at the oak door of Nelliel's dormitory. He could hear the sound of feet shuffling on the other side of the door, followed by hushed whispers, and then the unmistakable slap of a hand across a face.

Nnoitra sighed and thought to himself, _must be the two numpties._

The door swung open and there stood Nelliel's two fracciones; Pesche and Dondochakka. The latter was rubbing his cheek with his right hand, and Nnoitra immediately figured that he was the unfortunate one who had gotten that hard slap just seconds ago.

Dondochakka managed a weak smile and muttered an almost inaudible "Greetings, Nnoitra-sama!" Nnoitra returned it with the slightest nod of his head before averting his gaze to the other fraccion.

Pesche seemed to be in high spirits, Nnoitra noticed, as he was more fidgety than usual and if Nnoitra was not mistaken, he was doing that excited little dance with his feet. Nnoitra wondered if Pesche had finally been promoted and had left all the steaming crap of work in Dondochakka's hands.

Pesche gave a little bow and greeted the Quinto Espada pompously, "Good morning, Nnoitra-sama! We are pleased to welcome you!"

Nnoitra gave his signature grunt in response.

Pesche rubbed his hands together excitedly, and with a broad smile on his face, he continued, "Nelliel-sama has gone out for a while. She has instructed us to inform you to wait in _her room_ till she gets back."

Nnoitra thought he heard a hint of teasing in Pesche's voice in that last sentence he spoke.

_(Specifically, when he said "her room".)_

"But not to worry, Nnoitra-sama," Pesche went on as he leaned forward and wiggled his eyebrows in a comical manner, "she will be back very shortly!"

"Tch," Nnoitra hissed. "She left me no choice. Very well, I shall wait in her room."

.

/

.

Nelliel's bedroom was very clean, tidy and spacious. Unlike his, hers had large, clear, glass windows that allowed sufficient light to enter. It even overlooked the famous chalky hills of Hueco Mundo. _What a scenic view, _Nnoitra thought.

The room was furnished with a two-door wardrobe, a small bookshelf full of books, a comfortable armchair in a corner, as well as a queen-sized bed which, Nnoitra felt, seemed a little too big for Nel to be sleeping alone. Instantaneously, the image of Nel in her _Gamuza_ form popped into his mind and Nnoitra mentally acknowledged that the bed was _indeed just the right size_ for her.

(Yes, just right.)

"Please make yourself at home, Nnoitra-sama," came the voice of Dondochakka. "If there is anything you need—"

"Yes!" Pesche interrupted, jabbing his partner somewhat roughly in the gut. "If you need anything, please do not hesitate to call for us, Nnoitra-sama! Speaking of which, would you like a cup of tea?"

Nnoitra shut his eye briefly, and replied, "Nah, I'm good."

The two fracciones bowed in acknowledgement and left the room.

Nnoitra walked toward Nel's bed and noticed three books that were stacked nicely just beside the pillows.

_Bedtime stories, perhaps?_

He picked them up and sat on the bed, before looking through each of the book. The first two were self-esteem and motivational crap that did not intrigue him at the slightest bit. He was fazed, though, on how Nel still reads those kinds of books when her self-confidence was already towering enough. Meanwhile, the last book had stirred an interest in him. It was a novel written by Nicholas Sparks, titled "A Walk to Remember".

"Nelliel reads _love_ novels?" Nnoitra subconsciously spoke his mind aloud.

He laid on his back on the bed, his feet dangling over the edge. The bed somehow seemed a little too small now that it was him who's laying in it. Nnoitra flipped the book open to the bookmarked page, and began to read from wherever he assumed that Nel had trailed off. But after several lines into the first paragraph, he gave up reading.

"Stupid Nelliel!" He spat. "What a frickin' nerd! Always havin' her nose in a book! And books like these?!" Nnoitra snorted before he excaimed, "What a frickin' hopeless romantic!"

He let out a deep exhale. A minute later, he flipped the book open again and resumed his reading. This time, he turned to the page just before the one that was bookmarked, and to his surprise, there were several markings in some paragraphs. It appeared like Nel had highlighted quite a number of statements in the book—more accurately, _quotes_—that she had found either important, or that which she had enjoyed. Nnoitra flipped to other earlier pages and saw the same thing done _twice, thrice, many, many times._ He then decided to read those lines that she had specifically highlighted.

One or two lines were, meh, he couldn't really relate to them in any way. He couldn't even fathom why Nel would even highlight them in the first place! It didn't sound important, neither meaningful, nor philosophical. And then there was one or two, even three, that made him pause for a moment and sink into deep, deep thoughts. Deep enough to make him think if _this feeling_ that he has deep down inside of him _was actually love_. His insides did a somersault and Nnoitra recollected himself, brushing those thoughts aside. He rolled his eye skyward and grumbled, "How pathetic! Now I myself am a frickin' hopeless romantic! And a nerd like her!"

He found it hard to believe that he was in Nel's room right now, laying in Nel's bed and doing Nel's favourite thing: reading. This was too ridiculous! Absolutely unbelievable! Beyond comprehensible! _No one, and not even Tesra, especially, should ever know about this, _he exclaimed in his mind.

.

/

.

Nnoitra glanced at the clock on the cream-colored wall and realized that 30 minutes had already passed. Still no signs of Nelliel. He laid the book face down on his chest and pursed his lips. He wondered where she could have gone to.

_(Not like it was his business, anyway.)_

He closed his eye, breathed deep, and listened to the ambient sounds of his surroundings. The clock was ticking and he could hear it; even feel it inside him. Then gradually, he heard the distant chatters of Pesche and Dondochakka, possibly arguing over something petty and highly unnecessary. And as their voices died down, he could almost hear the breeze that was softly whistling outside. But that's about it, the sound of the scenery was monotonous — nothing melodic, like the sounds of birds chirping and singing; nothing naturalistic, like the sounds of leaves rustling and branches creaking when the wind blows against them. The atmosphere is dead here, and empty. _As dead and empty as his soul._

_(Very so like the others too. As much as none of them would admit.)_

Progressively, the sounds faded and everything went silent, except for the sound of his own heart beating against the darkness that was beginning to envelop his mind.

_**Thump. Thump. Thump. **_He could only hear the thumping of his heart.

Nnoitra gently ran his lean fingers through his soft, silky, black hair in one clean sweep and exhaled lightly. Just then, repressed memories from the darkest recesses of his memory banks came pouring in like a river in high tide. Round, hazel eyes, teal beach waves, luscious, pink lips, ragged breaths and murmurs against his chest, and the faintest whisper of _oh, oh God—_

Nnoitra pushed the nasty images away and opened his eye. _What the heck?!_ He could not believe that the memories had somehow managed to creep into his mind even without Nelliel in sight. Why?

Why must he still remember the moments they had previously shared?

Why can't he just forget them? Every single one of them.

_Why?_

He muttered vulgarities under his breath, and picked the book up again, hoping that reading would help to hinder any unwanted thoughts from coming back.

_(Surely, reading a love novel isn't going to help, you dumbass.)_

He went on to read the highlighted lines, page by page, humming an awful tune as he did so. He knew that he sounded even more terrible than Tesra, but he couldn't care less because humming did sort of help to calm him down. Soon after, Nnoitra heard the unmistakable voice of Nelliel echoing in the distance.

He immediately sat upright on the bed and put away the books to their original position. He adjusted the collar and sleeves of his uniform nicely, smoothed his hair, and then rested his elbows on his lap with his right fist supporting his chin. Perfect pose.

Barely a minute later, Nel entered the room and both their eyes met. They gazed at each other for ten intense seconds, without uttering a single word, before she broke the stare. Nnoitra thought there was something different in that look she had given him.

Nel cleared her throat, rather awkwardly, and asked in a gentle, soothing voice, "I'm sorry, Nnoitra, did I make you wait a Iittle too long?"

He wanted to say yes, and told her that he had transformed into a nerd in a span of less than an hour and had even taken up a new hobby, that was reading; but he thought it best to shut his trap — just in case she'd make fun of him one day. Yes, Nelliel enjoys teasing someone, especially Nnoitra. He dislikes it, and he could never understand _why and how_ she was able to derive pleasure from that.

(Nel is a masochist.)

He shook his head gently while he kept a steady gaze on her soft, hazel eyes that were staring him back. "Just a little, but it's fine," he replied.

Nel smiled, and Nnoitra returned her with a brief smirk. She shut the door behind her and walked toward him.

_She looked beautiful, _he thought. The gentle breeze blowing outside swept her long, teal, beach waves behind her shoulder as she advanced closer. And although her uniform fully covered her entirely from neck to toe, it clung to her in a perfect manner, accentuating her hourglass figure and feminine curves. That has _always_ immensely impressed Nnoitra — Nelliel**_ did not_** need to put any effort at all, she's already (hella) sexy in her modest way.

Nnoitra felt his heart race madly against his chest with each step that she took. And he wasn't sure why.

_Dammit_, he cussed,_ is this a side effect of reading that book?! Or could it be because of the memories that replayed in my mind earlier?!_

Whatever the reason, or the cause, he didn't know.

(Or maybe he _does_ know.)

Nel settled herself beside him, and Nnoitra swallowed the lump in his throat. _Too close. _She was too close for comfort. Close enough that their bodies were _almost_ touching. Close enough that he could feel her heat tremor from her body. Close enough that the sparks _within them_ could be ignited once more and engulf them in the flames of their passion.

Nnoitra let out a short (read: clearly) fake cough and repositioned himself so that he was at least three inches away from her.

"You told me that you wanted to talk to me about something," she began. "What is it?" She looked straight at Nnoitra, not realizing that she was making him shiver throughout his entire body.

_What is this feeling?!_ Nnoitra hissed, inwardly.

He felt as if he couldn't breathe properly and a clamor of nerves was coiling deep in his gut. He could have sworn that his face had turned pale, his pulse was beating rapidly, and he could feel beads of perspiration gather on his forehead, and he was trying so hard to keep himself calm.

_What the hell is wrong with me?!_

**Deep breaths, deep breaths.**

After what felt like eternity, when it was only seconds, Nnoitra managed to regain his composure. "I want you to fight me to the death, Nelliel."

Nel sighed, and looked away. She did not say anything for a long time. _Until..._

"Why, Nnoitra? Why, this, again?"

"You already know why. Because I want to—"

"Die," Nel interjected, frustration in her voice. "You badly wanna die, right? Why?"

Nnoitra could hear the crack in her voice. He could sense the sadness in her words. He could feel the anger that was rippling inside her. His mind was exploding with questions it made him giddy and sick to his stomach.

_Is she mad at me? Why? Why would she be mad that I wanted to die? Does she care about me? Why? Why would she even care to know the reason why I badly wanted to die? Is she afraid? Why? Why would she be afraid?_

_Is she... Is she afraid of losing me?_

(You wish.)

Nel suddenly turned to face him, rage apparent on her face. He could feel her gaze branding him.

"Why are you so desperate to die, Nnoitra?" She asked through gritted teeth. "Did you think that everything would be better after you're gone from this world? Did you think that dying would solve all of your problems and misery? Did you think that with death, comes peace? Huh? Did you think that death would stop all pain? What about m—"

Nel stopped abruptly in her sentence. She tore her gaze away from his cold, empty eyes and wrapped her arms around her waist. Whatever that she had intended to say, Nnoitra didn't know. And he wouldn't press her on to say it. There's a reason she had cut herself mid-sentence, and as to why she did so, _he didn't want to know._

But then, Nel's words had disturbed him and somehow sparked another thought in his mind.

_Was she implying that she did not want me to leave her? But that's impossible! She doesn't need me! Why the fuck would she even need someone like me? I'm nothing but a pain in her ass! Her life would be better __**without**__ me in it!_

Nnoitra stared at her and he could have sworn that he had seen a tear. But then Nel did something to the strands of hair on her face (or maybe she had fixed her eyes) and next thing he knew, that tear was gone. If only he had reached his hand out a little quicker, he could have ascertained what he had seen, or imagined.

"There's nothin' left here for us, Nelliel. Nothin' great ta' look forward ta'. I've no purpose anymore. Am of no use. And I'm fuckin' sick and tired of this miserable, hopeless life." Nnoitra said.

"We're going to _die_ here anyway. All of us. One way or another," Nel replied in a dangerously low tone. She paused momentarily, before doing something that came as a shock to Nnoitra.

She edged closer toward him, and cupped his cheek in her hand. _Nel was really close to him._ Too close that he finally noticed her hazel eyes that shone brightly as she tried to fight back her tears. "We're all going to die here, in the end. So why not embrace the life that we have right now and create beautiful memories out of it? We did it before and it worked out perfectly for us. But what _stopped_ you all of a sudden?"

She looked deep into his eye, as if pleading with him not to end his life just yet. "You and I are going to die here, Nnoitra. **_Together. _**There's no escaping that. But I refuse to die in misery. I refuse to die knowing that things could have turned out better. I refuse to die regretting about all that could have been. So please, Nnoitra Jiruga, can we just continue everything from where we had left and create more beautiful moments between us?"

—

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**the end.**

/

**Word count: **2,647

**P.s.:** _Don't forget to leave me a feedback, and favorite it if you have enjoyed it. - xoxo_


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